Kara Swisher

Recent Posts by Kara Swisher

If Some Dad's Rants on Twitter Can Go Viral, My Mom Needs to Turbo-Tweet

lucretia_ventre

Oh, dear; now my mom is going to be really pissed at me for not making her a Twitter sensation.

Unlike, according to a very amusing article in The Wall Street Journal yesterday, Justin Halpern–who has been tweeting wacky quips uttered by his dad without him knowing much about it, under the handle: @s—mydadsays.

And, lo and behold, with only 28 tweets, the cranky 73-year-old has attracted almost 250,000 followers, after a spate of media attention and retweeting.

Some tweets included:

“Don’t touch the bacon, it’s not done yet. You let me handle the bacon, and i’ll let you handle…what ever it is you do. I guess nothing.”

“You know, sometimes it’s nice having you around. But now ain’t one of those times. Now gimmie the remote we’re not watching this bullshit.”

“What are you listening to?…I know who Hall & Oates are god dammit. It’s the mustache guy and the gay man.”

The tweets have caused such a hubbub that Halpern has been approached by book agents, publishers and producers.

Rut-roh, since my brother and I did the same thing at Walt Mossberg’s and my D: All Things Digital conference, typing up my mother’s observations of some of Silicon Valley’s poobahs and more in 140 characters.

We did so after she expressed her distaste of Twitter in a video I showed before interviewing its founders, Biz Stone and Evan Williams, onstage (see below).

Here is the account name: @luckyd7.

Some of her 40 tweets (which, I hate to admit, I have not updated since mid-June):

“I’m going to bed. Why would anybody care about that!”

“Kara says ashton kutcher twitters. So what! His claim to fame is he married someone eighteen years older.”

“Just met the twitter guys. They are so cute. I’m embarrassed.”

“Oh my god! Kara put my wedding portrait as my twitter picture. Then again, I did look fabulous.”

“Steve Ballmer just announced the name of his new search program. Bing! I don’t like it. It’s stupid. Reminds me of the Sopranos.”

Obviously, to catch Mr. Halpern, I am going to have to up my game and start stalking my mother for spicier fare–because from the mouths of parents, ofttimes come gems.

Until then, here she is in that Twitter-bashing video:


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236 years ago, Twitter was a dude yelling in a town square, Linkedin was just your last name, and you played FarmVille to survive.

— Aaron Levie, via Twitter