Okay, okay, we get it: Morgan Stanley got the coveted left-hand lead position on Facebook’s blockbuster IPO filing. Goldman Sachs is there, too, but in the third-place, always-a-bridesmaid spo,t and is crying big salty tears about the injustice of it all.

It’s hard to feel badly for overpaid investment bankers, and focusing on them is kind of like endlessly discussing the lawyers who processed your mortgage, when the focus should be on the house you’re buying.

Does anyone except a few Richie Rich ZIP Codes in Manhattan care about this one deet of the initial public offering of the social networking giant?

Nope, but there is so little real news ahead of the IPO filing expected today that this is what we are chomping on this morning, as everyone awaits the big doc drop at the Securities and Exchange Commission.

Sources said it is likely to come this afternoon rather than this morning, though. And, perish the thought, all that dotting of I’s and crossing of T’s could delay it to tomorrow, even (unlikely, but mebbe!).

Sigh.

Tidbit: Facebook was actually founded the first Wednesday in February of 2004 in an undergraduate dorm room at Harvard University, like today but eight years later.

Thus, here’s a boring Facebook history timeline chart to look at:

Okay, that was really dull.

What up? The board met, the spinmeisters are at the ready and, most of all, Silicon Valley is stoked to make some more arrogant badillionaires.

Now, hopefully, we’ll get the real news about Facebook.

Namely, who’s getting the big dough in this much-anticipated Web 2.0 gambit? Co-founder and CEO and Hoodie Commander Mark Zuckerberg fer sure, but who else?

Plus all the juicy financials from Facebook, along with stats in usage, growth and just how much the company sticks it to its gaming serf — oops, partner — Zynga and others for the privilege of being on its all-powerful platform.

Me? I pay nada, like other Facebook users, for being able to show off pictures of my vacations and decline friendships from PR people I like, but still … well, you know.

Here is another Facebook financial chart that will not knock your socks off unless you are an accountant:

I am now so comatose waiting for the show to begin that I briefly began a liveblog of my activities this morning.

It went like this:

4:45 am PT: Done with AOL Q4 earnings, which were meh, but better meh than expected. AOL, if you recall, used to be Facebook and now is, um, not.

Note to Zuckerberg: Be nice to people on your way up, since you’ll meet them again on the way down.

4:46 am PT: I check the SEC site and get zip. Click, click, clickety-click over to find out the latest on Demi Moore and her fake-pot debacle.

Who knew there was synthetic cannabis and it is called K2 or Spice? Not me! According to Wikipedia: “It seems likely that synthetic cannabis can precipitate psychosis and in some cases it is prolonged.”

I decide to blame Ashton Kutcher and then wonder if he is an investor in Facebook via BFF-to-errant-celebrities-who-like-tech Ron Conway, also a Facebook investor.

Note to self: Call Ashton! That dude plays village idiots all the time, but I am not fooled by Mr. Pretty Face.

4:47 am PT: I consider email bombing Yahoo’s Jerry Yang, who is probably not so busy right now, and asking him what he thinks about the Demi Moore crisis and also Facebook’s IPO.

Remember when Yahoo was king of Silicon Valley and Yang posed in that purple VW on the cover of that magazine? Better still, remember when Yahoo was going to buy Facebook for just over $1 billion and then borked it?

Just sayin’, Mark — so, keep it reals!

4:48 am PT: I consider going out for doughnuts — and not because of any real weed need. I just would like me some glazed and sprinkled sugar treats right about now. Then, I could post the pictures of them on my Facebook page.

Sweet.

But you-know-who would file right when I left the house on the munchie run. Click, click, clickety-click over to the SEC site and I come up peanuts.

Time to check in on the Kardashians.

You get the idea — so, Facebook IPO, take me away!

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At least that’s what Fab.com has discovered after analyzing the performance of the company’s social channels in July. Three of the company’s top-performing sales that month had a common theme: Demi Moore tweeted about them.

Think of it as the next generation of the late-night infomercial — but instead of George Foreman selling grills, Demi Moore is selling accent pillows, aprons and wall decorations.

In one tweet, @mrskutcher writes to her nearly four million followers: “Another cool wall decoration. Love it! Surface Collective Limited quantity.” In another vague tweet, she writes: “Bought a bunch of these & earned credit! These are fun!”

The flash sales site launched in June, selling a wide range of items, from household objects to jewelry and gadgets. The New York start-up raised $8 million in a first round of capital, including from actor Ashton Kutcher, who is married to Moore.

In order to analyze the usefulness of email, Twitter and Facebook as revenue sources, Fab.com broke down its revenues resulting from social shares to find patterns among repeat buyers and the most popular categories, according to this blog post.

The results should be taken with a grain of salt, given that the company has been in business for only a couple of months (not to mention it is being propped up by Moore, the wife of one of its investors!). But it does provide a peek into how e-commerce companies are using social channels to drive more sales and sign up new members early on.

Some other findings:

• Fab.com added more than 130,000 members in July, bringing its total to more than 400,000 at the end of the month. Most members were added via old-fashioned email, but also by Twitter and Facebook shares and “likes.”
• Member-to-member email invitations resulted in four times the revenue of any of the other social sharing sources.
• Facebook and Twitter essentially tied as social revenue sources. While both paled in comparison to email invites, they both drove significant six-figure revenue for the company during the month.
• Some 40 percent of all Fab.com members who made at least one purchase in July ended up making two more purchases in the month. And the 33 percent who made two purchases ended up making three.
• Art was by far the top-grossing sales category, followed by jewelry, wearables, Bbags and fitness (primarily bikes).

Or, more accurately, it doesn’t want to tell you about it: The search engine gets heavy use from people looking for “adult” topics (duh), but, for fairly obvious reasons, Google doesn’t want to fill your results page with naughty stuff if you’re not seeking it out.

But that does mean that in some cases people with more-innocent search queries won’t get Instant results.

Search Engine Land’s Danny Sullivan spends some time walking through Google Instant’s (intentionally) blind spots–if you’re looking for the excellent “Naked Gun” movies, you’ll be out of luck, he notes. Same goes for Picasso’s “Blue Nude,” etc.

And of course, since Google (GOOG) is not actually infallible, Sullivan points out some instances where its censor misses some targets. For instance, “Demi Moore Bush” is not about the actress’s political views. Sullivan ultimately takes the logical step and types in all of George Carlin’s seven words to see how many produce results. Well worth looking at his piece to see how it turns out.

Meantime, here’s Carlin’s famous bit, and you can figure out on your own if it’s safe for work.

Actor Ashton Kutcher crossed the million-follower-on-Twitter line at 11:12 p.m. PDT, beating CNN.

Kutcher simply tweeted: “Victory is ours!!!!!!!!

The CNN cable news channel went over the million mark soon after, but still a clear second.

Here is a pix, below, from Twitter HQ of the Kutcher win, on its database (courtesy of Twitter’s Jessica Verrilli).

The race was getting close as midnight neared on the West Coast.

Not a real race, but a race of the Twits.

That would be Kutcher vs. CNN.

CNN was all over the issue on airwaves tonight touting its Twitter feed, because–you know–there is no more important news to cover, like the weak economy or anything.

And at Twitter’s offices in San Francisco, staff was up monitoring the race to one million “followers,” those who sign up to receive a person’s or organization’s tweets on the hot microblogging service.

Kutcher is scheduled to be on “The Oprah Winfrey Show” later today, along with Twitter CEO and co-founder Evan Williams, when the talk show host will do her first tweet.

Oprah, of course, will get to one million users in 4.67 seconds, which is making everyone on Twitter worry about the looming Fail Whale of all time.

(Oprah Friend-in-Chief Gayle King is already up and tweeting via @kinggayle–with her first one going over 140 characters, oops, just as we all did.)

In a moment of temporary insanity, BoomTown actually clicked the follow button for Kutcher.

What can I say? I like “Punk’d” and want Larry King to go down like a ton of bricks.

Now I am officially worried about what Kutcher–whose Twitter handle is aplusk–will do with his one million minions. Order us all to play idiotic practical jokes on people? Rent Demi Moore movies, even the unwatchable ones (“G.I. Jane” anyone?), over and over? Get 1970s mullets?

If you are so inclined, here’s a chart of the situation now from chartbeat, with the numbers ticking up like a clock, which you can track here (click on the chart to make it larger):

While we wait, here is a video of the famous haircutting scene from “G.I. Jane”: