You were expecting an A+, right?

Because of all the cursing and tough talk and uber-sassy assistant and loyal sidekick, Judy.

And especially, the use of elaborate barnyard metaphors from Yahoo CEO Carol Bartz’s growing up in Wisconsin to describe the Internet giant’s current state of affairs.

That includes the priceless bon mots from an earnings call last year: “This is not a company that needs to be pulled apart and left for the chickens.”

Not unless Farmer Bartz says it needs to be, that is!

I began handing out marks to Bartz recently, after she gave herself a B- for overall performance for the year since she took over the troubled Internet giant.

But I decided to be more specific, splitting the grades for Yahoo in 2009 into five categories.

I awarded Bartz an A- for management, a C+ for financials, a C- for product innovation and an incomplete for deal-making so far.

And, indeed all signs should point to A+ on the fifth, moxie, especially when you are talking about Bartz, one of the more colorful of Internet CEOs on the scene these days.

While AOL (AOL) CEO Tim Armstrong has those Don Draper cheekbones, Microsoft (MSFT) CEO Steve Ballmer that whole sweaty energy thing, Amazon (AMZN) Jeff Bezos the borderline maniacal vibe and Google (GOOG) CEO Eric Schmidt the big-brained alien act, Bartz is still 110 percent more entertaining on any given day.

But if you really think about it, she has been much more systematic in her tenure, making no dramatic, swing-for-the-fences moves, despite displaying a great deal of style.

More Taylor Swift than Lady Gaga, if you get my drift.

Like the deeply calculated Swift, Carol Bartz is a careful fixer–cutting costs at the Silicon Valley icon, finally making the inevitable search and online advertising deal with Microsoft, doing a lot of obvious internal rejiggering of systems, prettying up the front page and starting a much needed marketing campaign.

And while this all meets one definition of moxie–energy and pep–it’s still not that kind of fizzy riskiness (no wacky outfits for Yahoo!) that perhaps is still coming.

According to various definitions, the word’s etymology is from Moxie, a soft drink from the early 20th century that was one of the first mass-produced carbonated beverages in the U.S.

Per Wikipedia, its origins are as “a panacea, it was supposed to be especially effective against ‘paralysis, softening of the brain, nervousness and insomnia.’”

Would that Yahoo could be that to consumers!

Sadly for Moxie, while it still survives in New England, it got knocked out of the soda race by Coca Cola (KO), much as the ubiquitous Google knocked Yahoo out of the search business.

But Bartz, who just completed an executive offsite at Half Moon Bay, Calif., might be ready to trot out her act more dramatically in the months to come and, therefore, up the moxie stakes.

At the end of Yahoo’s recent conference call for its fourth-quarter earnings, she noted firmly that, “We’re done looking inward.”

Indeed, sources tell me Bartz has decided to start bringing all kinds of outside thoughts and influences into Yahoo next to try to shake up the often self-absorbed culture.

Maybe Gaga?

Rah rah ah-ah-ah! Ro mah ro-mah-mah! Gaga Ooh-la-la!

Now that would show some real moxie.

Until that happens, here is video of the bizarre singer at the Grammy Awards a few days ago, as well as the dreadfully off-pitch Swift (what is up with that?):

There they were, just minding their own business. And trying to generate a bit more business via the Wisconsin Tourism Federation, a 30-year-old industry lobbying group.

And then you smart alecks have to go and point out that the group’s acronym has become a popular way for kids these days to express befuddlement, in an R-rated way. (If you’re not sure what I’m talking about, go ahead and type “WTF” into a text message and send it off to some of your pals under the age of, say, 40. They’ll spell it out for you.)

So the WTF had to go and change its logo, Web site and name. If you’re looking for “Wisconsin tourism industry’s unified voice in government relations,” you should Google “Tourism Federation of Wisconsin” from now on.

What a hassle! All of which could have been avoided if you people were less reliant on acronyms and F-bombs.

But since that’s unlikely to change, somebody ought to give Finite Matters Ltd. a heads-up, too.

[Before and after logos via The Register]

Oh, a nice tiny surprise from Yahoo, as it reported its fourth-quarter results, which came in at 17 cents a share in adjusted earnings, compared to the 12 to 13 cents Wall Street was expecting.

“Despite the challenging economic environment, Yahoo! delivered adjusted operating cash flow above the midpoint of guidance for the fourth quarter,” said new Yahoo CEO Carol Bartz in the company’s official release. “The company also made important investments while aggressively managing costs, leaving us better positioned to weather the economic downturn and emerge stronger when advertiser spending improves. We have work to do, but I am excited by Yahoo!’s opportunities, and encouraged by the tremendous innovation and momentum I’ve seen since joining the company as CEO.”

But let’s experience Bartz Live and Unplugged at the fourth-quarter earnings conference call, including a Q&A in which–the company’s intro speaker noted at the top of the call–former Yahoo (YHOO) CEO and Co-Founder Jerry Yang might make an unexpected cameo appearance.

(He didn’t.)

2:08 p.m. PST:

It’s Carol’s show obviously, coming on first and foremost, with a little joke, after hearing all the typical caveats that must be uttered by Yahoo’s investor relations folks before the call begins.

“I should have understood all those risks before I took this job,” she chuckled.

Now that’s the understatement of the year!

Noting she has been on the job only eight days, meeting and greeting the folks of Yahoo, Bartz said she was impressed by the energy and “can-do” spirit of the company, noting that the product pipeline was fantastic.

Of course, products have never been the problem at Yahoo, as many have noted (including BoomTown many, many times). Execution has been the devil in the details!

Bartz obviously got this, but was not going to insult former management this time, as she did in her debut public conference with the press and analysts.

Right after she was hired in mid-January, Bartz noted that Yahoo and its assets, “frankly, could use a little management.”

But it is probably not a good idea to say that again with thus-far silent Jerry Yang sitting right next to her.

2:09 p.m. PST

A tiny bit of kissing up to Bartz by CFO Blake Jorgensen, who started to go over the numbers in great detail, putting the best face on a weakish performance overall, especially compared to previous years.

At the end, he said that Yahoo had performed well in 2008, considering the poor economy, and added guidance going forward was not great either, especially compared to a year ago.

Also, he warned Wall Street not to expect too much guidance for 2009, as Microsoft had also said last week in its own depressing earnings call.

2:20 p.m PST:

Back to can-do Carol Bartz, who began by pointing to all the various assets that Yahoo has–including its Build Your Own Search Service (BOSS) product and Yahoo News–all of which are strong products for advertisers, she said.

But Bartz also finally made the point that execution needs to improve, which she said was “addressable.”

Before the Q&A started, she answered some questions about the company she asked herself, before they could be asked by others. Apparently, now that Bartz is an “insider,” she knows better than anyone else!

Did she come to Yahoo to sell it? “No.”

Will she sell search? Bartz does not know yet, but noted “search is a very valuable part of [Yahoo's] business.”

She added that Yahoo search market share was three times the size of the third player, which Bartz curiously did not name, but which is–of course!–Microsoft–which wants very much to buy Yahoo’s search business.

Uh-oh, Microsoft (MSFT) CEO Steve Ballmer might not get his way so quickly!

2:26 p.m. PST:

The first question was about selling the company.

“I did not come to Yahoo to sell the company,” said Bartz again. “It’s too early to say more than that.”

The second question was about reports–in this column too!–about talks with Microsoft and Time Warner (TWX) unit AOL recently.

Bartz said Yahoo does not comment on reports that “come from nowhere.”

Sorry to disagree, but they did come from somewhere and were very well-sourced–just like the absolutely on-target post this column did of Bartz’s pending CEOship at Yahoo, before it was officially announced. But let’s just try to ignore that slight and move on–unless, of course, Bartz keeps up with what has become regular blog-bashing, which means a testy war of words and copious leaked memos to come!

The third question was about the management. Bartz said she plans on getting the lines of communication clearer, which she said she was really good at.

Kissing up to herself was a nice touch.

2:33 p.m. PST:

Next came a question about international business–which is the least of Yahoo’s worries, no matter what its execs say about the great products.

The next question was about guidance. No guidance, folks!

Now, one on the display business, with questions about the pressure on prices and on premium online advertising, which is Yahoo’s top business.

Jorgensen said Yahoo is trying to help advertisers, but that there has been and will continue to be a slowdown in advertising, due to the recession.

More on outlook, cost-cutting, etc. Jorgensen: More caution. Hey, analysts, we’re in a recession and I am not so sure how many ways he can say that.

So far, no Jerry Yang, which was starting to seem odd, since that Yahoo minion said he might be chatting away too.

But, as I said, it seems to be Carol’s show, which has been highly entertaining so far in her tenure, although she’d probably scowl at me sternly for saying that and pull out that cheap trick of insulting the press again.

Next up was a question to about various foreign assets and investments. Bartz will look into it! Jorgensen got in a good joke about her priority not being foreign tax issues.

The following question was about product innovation aimed at a younger demographic.

Bartz was on top of that too, pointing out that she has kids in their 20s.

First, she noted children do grow up, and that they will start to use Yahoo products like its finance offerings, as they move into the workforce and have less time to post dopey pictures on Facebook and throw digital sheep.

Also, young people are finicky, she added. They jumped from MySpace to Facebook, after all!

“Who knows what’s going to come next?,” she said, sounding like a typically exasperated parent. In other words, Yahoo will grab them when they grow up and prefer to be more dull!

2:43 p.m. PST:

The next question was about the timing of changes to come, which prompted Bartz to make another joke about buying the New York Times tomorrow! She was kidding, because the analyst asking the question suggested the troubled Yahoo buy the troubled media company in a recent report.

But, seriously folks, Bartz reiterated: “Gimme some time.”

Next, someone asked about the advertising sales force at Yahoo, which is a good question. Bartz is headed to a sales force meeting in a few weeks, she said, wherein she plans to have a beer with them and find out (once they are drunk and presumably easy to get blabbing).

Still, no Jerry Yang! Sigh. I suddenly desperately miss him and his lower-case ways.

The next question was on shareholder value, which has not been very valuable of late. Bartz noted that everything is on the table related to Yahoo’s businesses, but underscored how valuable the property is as a whole.

“This is not a company that needs to be pulled apart and left for the chickens,” said Bartz.

Apparently, this folksy little saying is from her Wisconsin upbringing. Scary poultry metaphor alert!

Bartz is asked about top assets at Yahoo.

She once again noted that Yahoo’s great products will save the day, from customization to integration of assets. “If we have strong products, we will attract the audience that just beats everything,” said Bartz.

A question about search and display being together, which is a sneaky way to ask about Microsoft, since that’s the great debate within Yahoo over whether to do a deal to outsource it or not.

Bartz made a confusing house metaphor, with search being the house, but it is completely lost on me. Is search the house or a living room or what?

“Whether we keep it or sell it, it’s an important asset,” Bartz then said, which was a clever way of saying exactly nothing.

2:55 p.m. PST:

A question on Yahoo brand, which Bartz basically said is about being the place people come every day. But she admitted there was too much complexity to that brand, although products are strong!

Next, someone asked a question about relevancy of Yahoo. “Our users don’t need constant change,” noted Bartz, who has a decent point about the jumpy nature of Web 2.0′s change-for-change’s-sake mantra.

Still–let’s be honest–Yahoo’s missed a key trend or two in recent years.

Next up was a question about ad prices and another on cost cuts. Jorgensen said that it’ll be more about efficiencies and perhaps some more outsourcing.

Bartz thanked the group for not being “too pushy” in their questions, which was an odd end note, since pushy should be the main job of analysts.

In fact, after listening to the call, I hope that Wall Street keeps up the pushy factor, as investors deserve a lot more answers from Bartz and Yahoo going forward.

It is not, as Bartz insisted in the conference call, a case of inside and outside perceptions being different. Yahoo does have strong products, but it still has gotten itself into its current mess all by itself, much of which has little to do with the weak economy.

That’s why I plan on being very pushy, asking about everything from what structural changes Bartz plans to make to how she envisions Yahoo’s business going forward to improving morale on a sustained basis to what she thinks she can do to make Yahoo the strongest it can be when the economy comes out of the recession.

And, not to get pushy or anything, but what happened to some words from the promised Jerry Yang?

Perhaps he fell victim to the vicious chickens of Wisconsin.

[Dear Yahoos: To get on board the Can-Do Carol Bartz Express, you can buy the "Yes We Can" t-shirt at Zazzle.com for just $23.40!]

This isn’t the first time Kohl has raised concerns about the long-term implications of Yahoo’s (YHOO) proposed deal with Google (GOOG). And it almost certainly won’t be the last. Back in September, he worried aloud that the partnership might reduce Yahoo to “nothing more than the newest satellite in the Google orbit.” And nothing much has changed since that time, except for Google’s increased advocacy of the deal on the new “Yahoo-Google Facts” site.

This isn’t the first time Kohl has raised concerns about the long-term implications of Yahoo’s (YHOO) proposed deal with Google (GOOG). And it almost certainly won’t be the last. Back in September, he worried aloud that the partnership might reduce Yahoo to “nothing more than the newest satellite in the Google orbit.” And nothing much has changed since that time, except for Google’s increased advocacy of the deal on the new “Yahoo-Google Facts” site.

Although we did not raid the offices of Silicon Alley Insider and “steal” Peter Kafka, as the fanciful SAI kingpin Henry Blodget alleges–had it been a raid, BoomTown would have properly hog-tied Blodget so he could not make such spurious allegations!–it is true that SAI’s current managing editor (pictured here) will be coming to work for us at AllThingD.com soon.

Indeed, Walt Mossberg and I, as well as the rest of the ATD team, are thrilled that Peter is coming onboard at the end of October. He will write a daily still-unnamed new media blog from New York City.

Walt and I have long wanted to bring in someone located on the East Coast and away from the echo chamber that Silicon Valley can be, because we both feel the ongoing digital revolution is taking place over a number of key industries all over this country and the world.

Peter was our first choice and has been on my must-read list since I began this blog. He is sharp, witty, confident and has the kind of reporting and writing chops that we think are key to giving readers high-quality, standards-based content they can trust.

With extensive connections across the media, advertising, entertainment and tech sectors, Peter will be doing original reporting, getting scoops, doing interviews, making videos and providing much needed and clear-headed analysis that he is so well known for.

Peter has worked at SAI since mid-2007. The first hire at the start-up tech business analysis site, he has focused on enterprise and beat reporting, as well as breaking news.

Previously, he spent 10 years as a reporter and editor at Forbes and Forbes.com covering media and technology. There he launched two tech columns, coordinated the video staff and represented Forbes on industry panels and in TV appearances for CNN, BBC and CNBC.

Peter was also a staff reporter with City Business in Minneapolis and a staff writer for the Minnesota Real Estate Journal in Bloomington from 1993 to 1997. Earlier, he was a stringer with the Milwaukee Journal and the Milwaukee Sentinel in Madison, Wis.

He holds a bachelor of arts from the University of Wisconsin and resides in Brooklyn, NY.

More importantly, Peter is a newly-minted father, which should give him more practice in prolonged sleep deprivation needed for his blogging.

He will begin at ATD on Oct. 27.

Along with Walt and me, Peter joins senior news editor John Paczkowski, author of the rocking Digital Daily column, who formerly wrote the award-winning blog, “Good Morning Silicon Valley” at the San Jose Mercury News, and Wall Street Journal reporter Katherine Boehret, who writes the most excellent weekly Mossberg Solution column.

We hope you are as thrilled as we are that Peter is coming soon to the ATD site.

(And if you want a little taste of Peter’s work, here’s a post he did yesterday on an appearance by Time Warner’s Jeff Bewkes at the Goldman Sachs media conference and another on Rupert Murdoch of News Corp. [News Corp. is the owner of Dow Jones and of this Web site].)

Today, BoomTown boards the Acela Express from New York’s Penn Station to D.C.’s Union Station to attend the Senate hearing on the Yahoo agreement with Google to outsource some of its ad search business.

Titled rather ominously, “The Google-Yahoo Agreement and the Future of Internet Advertising,” the Judiciary Committee’s Subcommittee on Antitrust, Competition Policy and Consumer Rights (eek!) will hear testimony at 10:30 a.m. at the Dirksen Senate Office Building from a passel of Internet reps, including those from Yahoo, Microsoft and Google.

It is chaired by Sen. Herbert Kohl (D., Wis.).

Will there be a lovely video of event? Indeed, there will be!

Added plus: I went to college and even worked on Capitol Hill, all before toiling at the Washington Post (Hey, Marcus!) for a dog’s age, so I know my way around the place.

And, as BoomTown readers might recall, I am not for the deal, mostly because it gives Google even more market power, even though the partnership is limited.

As I wrote:

As someone who has been a longtime critic of Microsoft’s (MSFT) historically thuggish tendencies, BoomTown finds it a little hard to believe that Yahoo and Google think that they can get away with any kind of significant search-ad outsourcing deal that would move the needle at Yahoo … .

And while it might be a long-cherished dream of Google’s to take over Yahoo search–and also get the chance to return to the scene of the crime, since Google got its first big push from doing Yahoo search, before Yahoo (YHOO) wised up too late–there is simply no way this will be allowed by regulators. Nor should it.

Still, you have to almost admire the chutzpah of the search giant in making this move, if the sheer and unadulterated arrogance of it wasn’t so distracting.

Because, while Google (GOOG) has almost none of the obvious menacing aggression that characterized Microsoft when it thoroughly dominated tech (although all those beach bikes on its campus inexplicably creep me out a little bit), the company still cannot be allowed to have a monopolistic share of the market.

It is bad for advertisers, it is bad for consumers, it is bad for innovation, no matter how well-intentioned Google is.”

So, you might imagine, I am looking forward to biting into this tasty piece of political theater!

Here is the list of speakers:

David Drummond
Senior Vice President
Corporate Development and Chief Legal Officer
Google
Mountain View, Calif.

Michael Callahan
General Counsel
Yahoo!
Sunnyvale, Calif.

Brad Smith
Senior Vice President and General Counsel
Microsoft
Redmond, Wash.

Matthew Crowley
Chief Marketing Officer
Yellowpages.com
Glendale, Calif.

Tim Carter
President and CEO
Askthebuilder.com
Cincinnati, Ohio

Please see this disclosure related to me and Google.